So I sat down with a couple of girls, Britt & Ayeshia, and discussed with them some of the things that they think society pushes on young guys like us and how its wrong. I have to admit, I had to restrain from defending the man-race as I thought that these things were all appreciated by women. I guess I was dead wrong! Guys, if you’re dating a girl who comes from a good family life, and most would consider them a “good girl,” then you might want to take a look at some of the things these girls said.
#1. The Dress Code.
This was a huge thing for me, thinking beforehand that girls liked the athletic look. You know, the black Nike socks pulled up, Nike trainers, basketball shorts and a T-shirt or muscle-shirt? This was my normal attire everyday, but then my whole life was wrecked when I found out they liked the occasional casual look. I was living a lie. Here are a few of the things they recommended:
The rugged Denim.
I’ve heard more than once (and again, shocked) that girls enjoyed looking at guy’s behinds, and did so just as much as guy’s did girl’s. It was told to me that they wanted nothing more than to see a guy’s butt hugged by ratted, rugged or fainted/light-colored jeans. I went out that day and bought some. If you have the same intentions, I’d urge you to get some RockRevivals or Buckle jeans. One of my interviewees informed me of her dying urge for more guys to dress in something other than basketball shorts and a ratted T-shirt:
“It’s one of my pet-peeves for a guy to constantly wear basketball shorts over a nice pair of jeans. Sure, the occasional pair of shorts is okay and all, but, I would rather they wear some pants for a change.”
A nice, tight-fit (but not too tight) T-shirt.
The best types of shirts are the ones that are tight around the chest and fit the shoulders correctly (the sleeve’s seams match up with the top of the shoulder). If the shirt is too baggy, it won’t give the same effect that the tighter fit does. If you’d rather wear a polo, wear a lighter color like green or white. “Same with the jeans,” one of them said, “A ratted T-shirt with stains, holes or rips isn’t a great choice.”
I asked them about shoes: “I prefer boots with nice jeans, but Sperry’s are a safe casual go-to.” Shoes didn’t bother them as much as the other items.
#2. The attitude of gratitude.
This is something us guys struggle with. We like to talk about ourselves…a lot! We talk about our you-know-what, our strength, our weights, our sex-appeal, but do the girls really fall for that? Sure, its great to be confident (and girls dig that more than anything) but when it came to the constant gibber-jabber about how much better we were than someone else, the girls felt like they were lost among the list of things the guys took for granted.
Now, I know what you’re thinking–“They’re just being dramatic.” While girls have some dramatic attributes, feeling lost in their boyfriends list of great things is not to be disregarded. Girls aren’t something we just get to look at–because they have feelings, too. While being cocky and arrogant can sometimes be our go-to, and while it may have its merits flirting, our girlfriends take it like they’re unneeded when all you can talk about is yourself. Having an attitude of appreciation for your girl and her personality can have a greater effect than any amount of material things you buy her.
#3. When the stench is real.
This should be one that no girl should have to tell you. You should just know this is a red flag. When you get done working out, playing a game of football, running a couple of miles or just smell, do not–I repeat DO NOT–spray cologne or body spray over the stench. The result is a smell of funkiness that overpowers the original scent and elevates the sweat smell a ton! Believe me, guys, I know. I thought I was doing the right thing when I put on Drakkar cologne over my natural human scent, but the result was terrible enough to kill a few people in the car with me.
Also, they informed me the number-two thing about personal hygene was brushing your teeth. They said that, when a guy leans over for a kiss, smelling his hot breath before pressing their lips up against his lips was, “to me, like kissing the seat of a toilet.” Guys, brush your teeth. Not only will this be a favor for your girls, but also everyone else whom you come into contact with.
“Too many guys think that a dab of cologne or spit of body spray will cover up the stench of BO. They are so wrong!” Said one of the culprits, “You need to take a shower, use soap and apply deodorant. I don’t care how pressed for time you may be.”
Being classy requires work, men.
#4. Manhood over gorilla-hood.
When girls cuss, guys feel comfortable with cussing around them. But what if your girl is considered a “good-girl” and doesn’t cuss all that much, or at all? What do you do? When the other guys first introduce you to a nice girl, but they’re all cussing, and you don’t know if she cusses, too? Listen up, men! We got a a job to do–hold off on the swears, SOB’s and crude humor. You might lose the darlin’ if you ruin it with your potty mouth, so hang on!
I asked the Ladies about this, and this is what they said:
“I don’t cuss, but when a guy does around me, I feel left out–like I’m not able to completely attached to him. I don’t cuss for moral reasons, but not everyone has that same point-of-view.”
The other said this: “Cussing makes you look un-classy. You could wear a Rolex, suit-and-tie, a great pair of shoes and still look ugly to me if you cuss-up a storm.”
Though it’s no fun to substitute words like, “poop,” “buttheads,” or “shhnickerdoodle,” not cussing for the first date (or at all) would be better than using the real words.